RoseSArtistry

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A look into an artists progress

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This page shows what started my life long obsession with the arts. I had a modest start, with just a pencil, some paper, and a device to show me different images to draw. I would sit for hours, tracing, copying and referencing different pieces of art I found alluring at the time, so in other words, I would plagiarise other peoples work to progress my own style. Though even at such a young age, I knew never to pass these pieces off as my own work, even now I must express that some of these drawings aren’t of my own original creation and if you where to reverse image search some of them you would find the original drawings somewhere on the internet, but this was the start, this is what helped me create a healthy relationship with art, and I look back at those days with fondness and gratitude.

I have always found dark themes interesting, most of the drawings you see have some unintentionally graphical content, but that’s just how I chose to express myself back then, and even today you still see that same content, but expressed in a far different manner. This would leak into my own self expression, I have explored a variety of different alternative styles, from emo, to rock chick, to gothic dress and now a mixture of all three. In many ways my own body is an expression of art, and how my past self imagined me when I was growing up.

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But back to the art itself, as you will see, I followed many different fan bases, to which I would make fan art of, or even my own OC’s (original characters) Themselves, some of the fan bases I was interested in at the time where; Five Nights at Freddy’s, Bendy and the Ink Machine, various types of anime and creepy pasta. This really helped me express my thoughts back then, and I would later start to use art as a sort of therapy, which would later lead me down the path of emotion and mental health expression you would see in my art today.

Now some keen eyes may have noticed something odd about a lot of the drawings I have included on this page, and I may as well note this as its fairly important to me. Now, on my website I’ve made it clear that I want to be vulnerable with no filter, but that doesn’t mean I wont protect my privacy. So on that front, you will have noticed that there are some changes made to each image, and that would be that I have removed the signatures and names from all of them. When I was young I would sign each drawing with my full name and signature to make them more personal to me, this however backfired on me as years later I came out as transgender and am now going by the name Rose. So to put a long paragraph short, I erased my deadname from these images to protect my privacy. I’m not sure if its easy to find my deadname on the internet right now, but I at least want to make it harder for others to find it out, this is a personal preference of mine and I would like to see it being treated with the same respect as someone changing their last name due to marriage, with that side note out of the way, its time to move onto more of my past art.

Looking back at the art I used to create gives me a lot of perspective on how I’ve improved my craft, but also I see what I have lost over time. Back then it was all about trying to get better at drawing, I would get frustrated if I couldn’t draw better than what I previously drew, I had many sketchbooks and random bits of paper with unfinished and erased work that didn’t match my perfectionist mindset back then, even some of these drawings where failed attempts at art. But seeing them all with fresh eyes allows one to understand the progress and development ones younger self would have passed off as another bad art day.

What I gained through this was a unique perspective with art, trial and error, every artist makes mistakes, its what you do with those mistakes that really make you an artist. Instead of scrapping and undervaluing your attempts, think of it as experience that will lead you to finding your true style. And note this, never compare yourself to another artists work, this will only drag you down further and leave you with art block, instead take every step as a chance to learn. Its through this line of thinking I lost something that had been holding me back, I lost a lot of my perfectionism.

“Art should comfort the disturbed and disturb the comfortable.”

I found this quote during my collage years, but it’s always a good quote to reference when I look back at my old work. I didn’t make art to impress, I did it for comfort, no matter how uncomfortable people would get with how I chose to express myself, I made art for me, and that’s all that mattered. This is something I continue to live by, and its what continues to inform my work no matter the circumstance.